How deep does the hole go?

Me and Ida/Bambaataa Monsters

Photo by Filipe Delgado on Pexels.com

Ida came through and washed the surface of my world.  I sat on the phone with my husband while he worked in the storm.  It got sketchy several times and I thought he would end up sleeping in the vehicle because all the roads were washed out. 

Ida and I tore through our emotions, she soaked the outside and I saturated my face and shirt with tears. My book has come to a pause because the energy and the emotions drain and drowned me in sorrow. Then I need to recover, breathe and meditate to bring my balance back in line.  I’ve never been great in asking for help or giving up, but I know when I need assistance because it hits me like a slap in the face sometimes.

Someone close to me said flippantly that she could write her story in six months because she is healed. At first her statement stung because it is taking me so long.  Then I remembered not to compare and me being me I understood where her statement came from. Hurt people, hurt people, and healed people heal people.  

This age of Revelations has me invigorated with expectation and hope and at the same time I’m completely wiped out both physically and emotionally.

I admire and keep up with a few YouTubers, one, H. Campbell who came out as a victim of child abuse. I watched as men (some his peers) laughed and made light of his pain. Clearly exposing their ignorance of mental anguish and maturity levels, but again, hurt people!

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